Thursday, September 14, 2006

Off-Day Questions to Ponder...

...With 16 Games Left in the Season:


Does Mike MacDougal's recent MRI on his pitching arm give you heartburn?

Or does David Riske entering a one-run playoff game feel more like an acid reflux chaser?

Mark Buehrle or Boone Logan as your LOOGY?

Freddy Garcia's brush with perfection: sign of things to come or aberration?

Does Bobby Jenks frighten you, and I'm not talking about facing his 100 mph fastball?

Which language should Iguchi learn first, English, Spanish or Sign Language? (Waving an arm in a circle does mean go home, right?)

Since Jim Thome is the best OBP guy on the Sox, should he go back to the 3 spot in the line-up?

Whom can the Sox least afford to lose to an injury, Crede (back), Thome (wrist) or Paulie (mental)?

AL Comeback Player of the Year: Jim Thome or Frank Thomas?

With losing Liriano for the rest of the season, can Johan Santana pitch the Twinkies into the playoffs?

If the Tiggers miss the playoffs after having a 10.5 game lead in the second half, will Jim Leyland snap and kill a batboy or will he just quit like he did in Colorado?

Should Neal Cotts try pitching right-handed?

How much more fun would this season have been if, instead of being married to Lisa Dergan, Scott Podsednik were married to Anna Benson?

If Jermaine Dye actaully wins the MVP award, where in The Cell will the White Sox erect his bronze statue?

Has Jon Garland truly turned the corner for his career, or will his dominace once again disappear like a Chicago sun-tan in the winter?

In the very inevitable fued to come, who's the first one out the door, Ozzie or Brian Anderson?

Speaking of fueds, if the Sox make the playoffs, will Jay Mariotti venture it into the clubhouse?

And if he does, will he make it out alive?

Being from the Fattest City in America, which will Sox fans die from first: Home Run Inn Pizza, Maxwell Street Polish and Old Style or the stress of a three team divisional race destined to last until the final weekend of the season?

Last and certainly most important...

Who will win the inaugural ChiSox Blog "Pick-to-Click" race? (I'll give you a hint, he wrote this post.)

15 Comments:

Blogger jamesmnordbergjr said...

I know I know...not everyone has participated in the PtC race from the beginning, heck, the writers didn't even do it that often early on in the season.

But for the sake of quelling the inevitable Fornelli-backlash, I'm calling it a three-team race!

(Just kidding, Tom.)

9/14/2006 12:06 PM  
Anonymous D.T. Kelly said...

Mac's MRI doesn't scare me. Yet.

Riske scares me. As does hearing Farmer say, "Cotts is up and throwing in the pen for the Sox." *shudder* I like the guy, but if he's not Damaso Marte of 2005, I don't know who is.

I'll openly admit to not knowing what LOOGY means in this context.

I'll be an optimist (read: Hopeful) and say Freddy is going to finish strong.

I wouldn't go so far as to say he frightens me, but Jenks is no longer a guarantee in my mind anymore.

I vote for semaphore.

I like Dye in the three spot, Thome in clean up, and Konerko in the fifth slot.

I don't think the Sox can afford to lose anyone, but least of all Thome.

My heart says Thome, my head says Thomas.

I'd like to see the Twins not make the playoffs, they're hungry and you can see it.

Leyland will spontaneously combust if the Tiggers miss the playoffs. Hopefully he'll be in a place that's easily cleaned.

Couldn't hurt at this point.

I'll pass on this question.

Right field concourse, of course.

I think Garland will continue to be a force in years to come.

I think Anderson will go before Guillen, but not long before.

No chance Mariotti will go into the locker room. Security won't let him.

Man, I miss HRI pizza. I'm hoping that the final series with the Twins will be meaningless, at least for the Sox.

I think if you prorate my PTC total, I'm way ahead of all of you. ;)

9/14/2006 12:14 PM  
Blogger jamesmnordbergjr said...

L-eft arm
O-ne
O-ut
G-uy
onl-Y

9/14/2006 12:43 PM  
Blogger DickdaStick said...

Mac - He throws in a harsh-type style that helps his effectiveness, but often leads to strain - time out should help. No heartburn

Riske I can also take without Pepto

Boone can be my LOOGY - Lefty one out guy. Buehrle will never not be a starter for Oz

Garcia - sign of good to come

Jenks does not scare - he'll bounce back like a beach ball

Iguchi was just practicing his Chinese Fire Drill for the next WS party

Keep Dye AT 3 - SPEED

least afford to lose Crede

Thome...Thomas a very close second

Twinks will make playoffs

Leyland....don't know what he will do

Cotts did okay yesterday...it's a start

If Scott were married to Rosie O'Donnell, at least one of them would have balls

Dye statue in Right field concourse

Garland will be fairly stud-like from here out

I love to see it - but Marriotti would never venture there....look to see if Hawk takes a shot at Jay over this jinx shit.

He'd crawl out with his tail between his legs if he did ever go in

That which doesn't kill us only makes us stronger...so we will live even longer as a result, probably live through Richie Daley's 23rd term at least !

If James keeps crying to Jeeves for credit for his "picks" like Jane Byrne bitching in the snow storm, then no one else has a chance !!!

9/14/2006 12:45 PM  
Blogger jamesmnordbergjr said...

Thank you, Dickie, you made me LOL twice.

9/14/2006 12:55 PM  
Blogger jamesmnordbergjr said...

Okay, I wrote that Jay Mariotti thing without knowing about today's column. Talk about your blatant attempt to stir up trouble. An objective columnist should steer away from talk about jinxes and fate and metaphysics.
Mariotti's last line was something like, "Next time, I'm bringing ducktape."
To what, Jay, a Jonathan Edwards taping of "From Beyond?"

9/14/2006 1:49 PM  
Blogger Jeeves said...

Maybe Paulie is looking to regain the 3-spot. He showed off some serious wheels yesterday. Not only did he score from first on a double, but he also had an infield single.

9/14/2006 3:32 PM  
Blogger Jeeves said...

I have no heartburn from Mac. If he goes down I might have a heartache though.

Riske makes me shudder.

I'm going with Boone as the LOOGY. Buehrle is coming around, maybe...please.

I'll actually be serious for this one. I think his near perfecto is a sign of things to come for Freddy, and I'll tell you why. Against the Angels, he featured (heavily) a new splitter, which gives me hope. I think he threw it in his last start as well, but I"m not sure. So the story goes, that he picked this up from Jose; I don't know if that's true, but it looks to be real effective for him.

Bobby's a big boy, he'll bounce back.

Gooch should go with Spanglish.

Keep Dye in the 3-hole.

The Sox have no replacement at third. Gload has shown he can competently fill in for Paulie or Thome.

I'll give Frank the award, and I'll take an ALCS victory over the A's.

Johan doesn't have to pitch them into the playoffs cuz the Tigers are on a sliiiiiiiiiide. Or they could clone him to make doubly sure.

Jim Leyland (hopefully) will attack Mags with a pair of hair clippers.

Cotts should try shaving first. It worked for Javy.

How about Pods being married to both Anna Benson and Lisa Dergen?

Right field stands make sense, but how funny would it be if they actually put it on the field? It would be like that World Series against the Cubs where one of the fans siiting on the field got in the way of a Cubs fielder.

Jon Garland equals ACE

Scott Podsednik is the first one out the door. Oh, he wasn't one of the choices?

I think Dale has everyone right where he wasn't him. He's going to put up a late season charge and score big time with some bonus value picks.
Just call me the Detroit Tigers. I jumped out to an early lead (with my mob connections) but then I believe Dick called me out on that so I had to ditch the Mafia help, and I've come crashing back toward the pack.

9/14/2006 3:46 PM  
Blogger Criminal Appeal said...

The Garcia game reminded me of the strangest thing I ever saw on a baseball field. Any of you guys remember when Andy Hawkins threw a no-hitter at Comiskey, and the Sox beat him 4-0 because the Yanks made three errors in the eighth? Good stuff. Also, check out the Chicago Magazine profile of Mariotti if you feel the need to purge the contents of your stomach.

9/14/2006 4:44 PM  
Blogger Fornelli said...

We all know that with my success rate on the PTC's I'd be way ahead had I been here all season. I've been posting here for what, a month or so? I'm already in 4th with 12. Took you guys 5 months to get to the 20's.

I would answer your questions, but frankly, I just don't want to. I'm tired and cranky.

Was out drinking late last night, and then up early for a trip to Brookfield Zoo with a bunch of my little cousins who are in from Atlanta and New York for my cousins wedding this weekend.

I did get one of those pimp ass Gorilla wax statues though...so I got that going for me which is nice.

Off to nap.

9/14/2006 5:06 PM  
Blogger jamesmnordbergjr said...

Maybe the Gorilla can sub for Pods?

9/14/2006 5:17 PM  
Blogger jamesmnordbergjr said...

Since this is an off-day (hell, even if it wasn't I'd post this) I'm gonna post this piece sad bit of irony.
Dog the Bounty Hunter (Along with his son, Leland, and associate, Tim) was arrested and detained for extradition to Mexico stemming from his "kidnapping" of Max Factor heir and serial rapist Andrew Luster who was wanted a a fugitive from the USA. Mexico has laws prohibitying bounty hunting, and Dog was originally arrested and posted bond in Mexico.
The irony of the story is, the warrant was issued from Mexico because he failed to appear in court.

9/14/2006 6:30 PM  
Blogger DickdaStick said...

....just another Dog Day Afternoon

9/14/2006 8:25 PM  
Blogger jamesmnordbergjr said...

I spent all day pondering and here's what I came up with...

The recipe for TUMS is great starting pitching.

More like a 5th of Jack.

Is Sandy Kofax available? No, well then give me Boone. Buehrle will be starting a game 3 if we have one.

Freddy's brush with perfection: more subscriptions for High Times mag.

Only if he had a hood over his head.

Gooch should learn the kinda language you need to open your eyes to hear.

Seriously, yes, even if JD's faster than he is.

None of the above.

No, but Bonser, Silva and Garza might.

In a fitting bit of irony, Jim Leyland will crash his car while intoxicated the day after the season ends into Dmitri Young's fan club.

Not if he's left off the playoff roster.

At least we would have heard from Nudnik if Anna was his wife. Lisa is smart to stay out of the limelight.

Next to Harold Baines's statue. They'd have a lot to talk about.

He may be dominant, but it won't be here in Chicago.

BA will make a comment about Latino players and Ozzie and his sons will gang bang his ass. He will then be traded for Felix Hernandez and wonder what all the fuss was about.

Only thru a video feed.

The TV certainly won't.

Clogged arteries and liver failure will take a backseat to the stroke Sox fans have if they win the World Series again.

As for the PtC...to quote LL Cool J..."Don't call it a comeback, I been here for years..."

9/15/2006 1:14 AM  
Blogger Pander said...

Speaking of comeback players, how about facing Esteban Loiaza tomorrow? That should be...fun...right?

9/15/2006 2:08 AM  

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